Dr Zeuss

My wife Helen went to a car boot sale this morning and returned with a miniature table and chair set, a toy aeroplane, a plastic wheelbarrow and a fistful of books including Dr Zeuss' debut work, The Cat in the Hat, released an incredible 53 years ago. Reading it to a book-hungry Jarvis has inspired me to imitate his work and create my own fast-paced rhyming narrative about an animal in an item of clothing. Protagonist options include the Macaque in the Anorak, the Fly in the Tie, the Rat in the Cravat, but I have settled for the Goat in the Coat.

Here goes:

The evening arrived and

The sun said goodbye.

"It's bedtime," was heard as

The moon rose in the sky.

The news was unwelcome;

Wide-eyed Ned wore a frown.

Jarvis hid his dismay

But he still felt quite down.

Once tucked up in bed,

The lights were turned out.

Misery flooded the room;

Fun was no longer about.

A dull night of nothing

Was all that lay ahead.

As the boys lay there

Sleepless bored and in bed.

Then rat-a-tat-tat

Was heard at the door.

Were they dreaming?

No, this was real, for sure.

Then in burst a goat

Wearing a crimson fur coat;

Clearing his voice

He uttered from his throat,

"I'm fantastically brilliant

I'm the Goat in the Coat,

I'm the best in the business,

Though I don't like to gloat.

I'm here to take you

For a night on a boat

Battling sea monsters

While bobbing along afloat."

Ned looked at Jarvis

And Jarvis looked at Ned.

Indecision was brief;

They jumped out of bed.

The Goat in the Coat

Had a strong notion

That nights weren't for sleep -

He led them to the ocean

Where they jumped in the boat

And sailed out to sea.

This was probably wreckless

I'm sure you'll agree.

No health and safety would let

Two toddlers in a boat

In the middle of the channel,

Their guardian, a goat.

The Goat in a Coat said,

"There's a battle to fight"

Ned looked a bit nervous.

The words gave Jar a fright.

Then out of the water

A scaly green monster rose.

It had deadly sharp claws

And shot bullets from its nose.

The twins were shocked

And momentarily froze.

The Goat in the Coat

Gave Jarvis an spear.

And Ned got an axe

He said, "There's nothing to fear".

Ned hacked at the monster's

Gargantuan neck.

Jarvis threw the spear skywards

From the tiny deck.

While the monster's flailing limbs

Threatened a wreck.

The spear hurtled up

Then hung in the sky

Then rushed downwards

Into the monster's eye.

Ned spotted his chance

And sent the axe through

The last few neck tendons.

The blood that spurted was blue.

Victory was theirs.

The Goat gave a cheer

And then said, "Oh no,

Morning is near".

He grabbed the oars

And paddled like crazy.

The sky was lightening,

Turning greyish and hazy.

The Goat in the Coat

Rushed the boys home

And said, "I'll be back

After my holiday in Rome."

And as the goat fled

With a clickety-clack

Mum and Dad arose

From their slumbersome sack.

"Good morning," Mum said

"Have you boys slept well?"

They looked at each other

And knew they never would tell.