The Duffalo
A Fulham fan took a stroll into the Europa League.
He met Shakhtar Donetsk and felt slight fatigue.
"I'm afraid your dream is soon to be over,
You'll never beat me, I'm the Euro League holder."
"That's terribly vain of you SD, but no -
Have you heard of Damien Duffalo?"
"Damien Duffalo? What's a Duffalo?"
"Damien Duffalo! Why didn't you know?
He's got a mercurial dribble, a rasping shot,
And his current form is steaming hot."
"Oh dear, Srna will have to stick to him like glue."
"I think you'll find he failed. We beat you three goals to two."
On went the Fulham fan laughing to himself wittily.
He stumbled into Juventus, the old lady of Italy.
"Oh dear little Fulham. This is your last day.
You're going to get munched by David Trezeguet."
"That's terribly vain of you Juve, but no -
Have you heard of Damien Duffalo?"
"Damien Duffalo? What's a Duffalo?"
"Damien Duffalo! Why didn't you know?
He's got pace to burn, a bewitching left peg,
He makes mugs of defenders with an embarrassing nutmeg."
"Oh dear, we'll have to get Cannavaro to shut the metaphorical door."
"I think you'll find the Duffalo opened it: five goals to four!"
The Fulham fan proceeded with an Easter bunny,
When he bumped into Wolfie, the champion of Germunny.
"Hello Full of ham, your adventure has been great,
But the victory is mine, it is my certain fate."
"That's terribly vain of you Wolfie, but no -
Have you heard of Damien Duffalo?"
"Damien Duffalo? What's a Duffalo?"
"Damien Duffalo! Why didn't you know?
He's got an eye for goal, he's athletic and lean,
He's our utterly fantastic number sixteen."
"Oh dear, Simunek will have have to halt his fun."
"I think you'll find the Duffalo is laughing: it's three goals to one."
The Fulham fan marched on, with a warm fuzzy glow,
Knowing that victory was certain with Damien Duffalo.
He's got a mercurial dribble, a rasping shot,
And his current form is steaming hot.
He's got pace to burn, a bewitching left peg,
He makes mugs of defenders with an embarrassing nutmeg.
He's got an eye for goal, he's athletic and lean,
He's our utterly fantastic number sixteen.
And with Hamburg in the way, it's surely worth a bet
That the Duffalo holds the keys to our trophy cabinet.
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